The journey of a broken heart 3

3. Feel like a fool

(Note: this is part 3 of 'the journey of the broken heart' series. To read from the beginning, click here.)

I started my trip at the inter-city bus station. So there I was, standing there, looking around when suddenly it hit me: I have never done this before. (I do travel, but mostly by flying, and a couple of times by train. But never by inter-city bus).

That means, I did not know which bus I should take, I did not know where I should go to buy the ticket and I did not know how much the ticket would be.

And the worst part is, it seems I was the only fool in town. Everybody else seem to know where to go and what to do.

Unfotunately, it did not happen just once, because as I travel from one city to another, almost in every city I was back to being clueless: I did not know which one to take to go to where I wanted to go, and when I knew, I had no clue how much it would cost me.

(Sure, there was one time when I could see the price posted on a local angkot. But then when I paid exactly that price, the driver got mad. Apparently the price had changed and they did not bother to change the sticker.)

And the story did not end after I managed all that and got on. Because I still needed to know where to get off, to go to where I was going. Along the way, I ended up asking a lot of questions to a lot of people.

In short, I am a foreigner in my own country. I can't imagine how foreigners who visit Indonesia would feel when they had to take public transportation to get around. How do you ask question when you don't even speak the language?

You don't feel good when you are clueless. And you feel worse when you think you are the only one who had no clue.

Before this, I always thought a good public transportation would mean something that is efficient, on time, fast and comfortable. Now I realize, there is one thing that is more important.

A public transport is good when you can get from point A to point B, without having to ask a single question.

Sure, efficient, on time, fast and comfortable are all good. But if the system is confusing, a first timer like me would still find it annoying.

I know I should stop comparing what we have with what other country has, but bear with me for a moment. The first time I visited Japan, I had no experience in taking its public transport. But I could find out easily which one I should take, how much it will cost and where I should buy the ticket. Bear in mind that I do not speak or read Japanese, and outside Tokyo not all stations post the sign in english. But the signs are equipped with pictures and symbols that even I can understand it right away.

A system is good when even an illiterate first-timer fool like me can understand it.

So maybe, this is why people said good things about public transport in some developed countries. Sure, they may be fast and comfortable, but above all, the system don't make you feel like a fool.

We all want better public transport in this country, and we started with the busway, people talk about having a subway system, even dreaming about high speed train. They are all nice, but they are also a departure from what we have now. As if we want to ditch whatever we have because they are bad, and just start with something completely new.

Sure, why not. But creating an efficient, on time, fast and comfortable takes time. And money.

In the meantime, we still have to live with what we have, and actually we can make it better by simply posting clear signs at bus stations and bus stops, displaying the route and the ticket price clearly on buses and angkot - And be consistent with it.

Design it for a foreign illiterate first-timer fool such as I am.

When everything is clear, taking a local public transport in a small town actually has its charm.

More than any subway or high speed train can offer.

The journey of a broken heart 2

2. The toilet psychology

(Note: this is part 2 of 'the journey of the broken heart' series. To read from the beginning, click here.)

One bad thing I did not realize until too late about taking this trip was that it will involve using public toilet. A lot.

I have been fortunate all my life. My parents are well-off and they protected me really well. They made sure my world is a comfortable world. That's both good and bad. Good because it allowed me to become who I am today (and I can't complain about that), and bad because now I am caught unprepared to live with this one little detail: The world of dirty stinky public toilet.

Some of you may find this ridiculous. Well, I am sorry. Obviously I have been living in a bubble all my life. A bubble where toilets somehow always magically clean itself before I enter.

So the first time I stepped into a public toilet, I thought I have just died and went to hell. In fact, if God is to punish me for all my sins, He would not burn me to eternity. Somehow, that seems less scary. Instead He'd probably send me to a dirty smelly slimy public toilet, with someone outside banging and yelling at the door, telling me to do it quicker. Now that's hell.

So why am I telling you this unpleasant experience?

It's because while sitting there, I realized something.

You see, when you go in, you may not stand the smell and the sight of it. It's dirty. It's stinky. It's disgusting.

But after a while, after you just can't hold your breath anymore, you start to accept it, and guess what: slowly but surely it is not that stinky anymore. Everything is fine. It's all ok.

Now I understand why our city is dirty and why our river is full of trash. Because somehow, after a while we just accepted it. We got used to it. Everything is fine. It's all ok.

And there is more:

Once you leave the stinky toilet for a while, your sense of smell recovers and the next time you come back to one, you realize (again) how stinky it is and you have to start the whole reconditioning process again.

And now I understand why some people (yes, me included) who just returned from a travel abroad, suddenly turned into a complainer, saying how bad things are in comparison to the country they visited.

(A short stop at Singapore's airport with its indoor garden, children playground and internet access, and suddenly Jakarta airport with its liquor ads and dirty bathroom looked incredibly ridiculous. One experience of taking the always-on-time shinkansen and suddenly taking a train at home is like going back to the stone age.)

Now wait, this does not mean I am comparing our country to a toilet.

What I am trying to say is once you are used to certain things, your point of view changes.

And when you step out of it, you hit the reset button and gain back the perspective that you once had.

But even this has a limit. Because after 3 weeks of going in and out of public toilets, I got so good at it that it does not bother me anymore. Not one bit. I am so proud.

And that made me think:

Maybe this is why it's so difficult to fight corruption in this country.

We've been stuck in the corruption toilet for way too long.

We know it's stinky, we know it's dirty. But hey, that's how we do our 'business' all this time and we're used to it.

Everything is fine. It's all ok.

The journey of a broken heart 1

1. Introduction

My name is Al, and as my colleagues have written previously, I just got back from my 3 week leave, taking a trip from west to east of Java, using only public transports.

Before I start, I thought I should clarify a few points first.

Number one, I am not a writer. I don't write and I am bad at it. So the "journey of a broken heart" posts you are about to read all have been kindly edited, some reworded, to fit the style of this blog. The thoughts are all mine, the hardwork of editing and rewriting to make it comprehensible is not. (thank you, Desi).

Number two, I don't keep a diary and this is not a travel diary. Everything was written after I got back, and I didn't really keep notes along the way. Therefore, this is more of "collections of thoughts", rather than chronological events. This is not going to be the "day 1, I did this, day 2, I went there" kind of writing. If you are expecting that, I am sorry to disappoint you. (But at least I have told you beforehand.)

Number three, I may not be able to name all the cities I visited. I did not have a travel plan, I never thought I would write about it, so I did not really keep track and some cities do look and feel similar and that blurs my memory a bit.

Number four, I did say I would only take public transports, and that I did consistently. I did not say however, that I would go on thrift budget. Whenever I needed to stay the night, I stayed at the most decent hotel I could find. This was not a backpacking trip, and after a rough day, I need at least a hot shower and a good sleep. So if you expect a story of a lonely guy writing about his suffering, this is not it.

Number five, some colleagues here at indonesia-anonymus find it hard to believe my story. They think I am just way to spoiled to do a stunt like this. Some think I made all this up.

Some of you may feel the same. I don't blame you and I am not asking you to believe anything that I tell you. All I can say is at least my life is not boring. Is yours?

Number six, I would be lying if my intention of taking this trip is solely to see my country. The fact is I've never taken any leave since I started working and my leave days started to accumulate to a point where HR said "if you don't use it you'll lose it". So I thought I should just go crazy for 3 weeks and after that I can go back to work in peace. The truth is, if I were not forced to take my leave, I would prefer to just go to work. This trip is not purely out of love, I am not that patriotic.

Number seven, I didn't do this because of a girl.

Well, ok. I did.

But she moved on and I did too.

I think.

The journey of a broken heart

Our young colleague, Al, is brokenhearted. His girlfriend dumped him, saying he spent too much time at work. to add salt to the wound, she is now planning to marry the rebound-guy whom she met not long after she left Al.

Al is devastated. One secretary claimed she saw him crying near the water-cooler. Al denied it.

But not all is lost: His hardwork paid off and he just got himself promoted. But even that did not make Al feel better. So one day after the promotion announcement, Al said:

"You know, I've never taken a day off since I started working here. Not once.

So now I am planning to take 3 weeks off and travel."

Sure. Why not. No surprise there. But then:

"I am going to travel the Java island, going east, taking only public transport."

What?

Now here's a thing you should now about Al. He is one of those who people call "winning the uterus lottery". He is born into a wealthy family, with no sibling, educated in private schools from elementary to high school, went to one of the most prestigious university in Indonesia, got his postgraduate degree abroad, and went back only to land himself on a nice cushy job with good pay. In short, life has been very kind to him. Al is one lucky son of a gun.

"Taking only public transport? What do you mean? You don't even take public transport to go to work!"

"I am going to do it. Just public transport. Buses. Going east. Visit the cities along the way. Once I reach Surabaya, I'll head home by train."

"How are you going to get around inside the city you visit?"

"Public transport. No renting a car, not even a cab. It has to be something that I ride with other fellow passengers."

"Have you ever done it before?"

"No".

"Have you gone backpacking before?"

"No."

"No way you're going to make it."

"Why not?"

"Because it is not as romantic as it sounds. Dude, you can't even survive taking a bus in Jakarta for a week. And now you are going to do it for three weeks? In cities you have never visited before? For what? It's not because of losing your girlfriend, is it?"

"No! Of course not! Well..., yes. Partly. Because I think she is right."

"How?"

"She said I am selfish. I only think of myself. And after some thought, I think she is right.

I have been selfish all my life.

All my life I am only working on making myself comfortable. As long as I am comfortable, I am fine. Even when I do charity, I do it only to make myself feel better. To make myself look good. It's all me me me.

I've been lucky that my parents took me abroad a lot when I was growing up. I compare what this country has with what developed countries have, and I always think we are so bad at so many things. The corruptions, the horrible traffic, the terrible airport, the bad public transport, the trash, the list goes on.

It's hard to love a country when you only think badly of it.

And when I think of it, when I call something bad, it is because that something is not making me comfortable. It's all me, me, me.

Public transport? Not comfortable. Bad. Avoid it. Why suffer. I don't want to suffer.

I even avoided going to some cities in Java just because they have no nice hotel.

And the more I avoid it, the more I don't understand it, and the more I criticize it.

So now I am going to try the opposite. I am going to embrace it."

Yeah right. One rich boy taking a trip to find the love to his country.

That's just way too corny. Please. Somebody shut him up right now.

But then three weeks later later, Al is back.

He did it.

And he has some stories to tell.

And he'll write them here.

So watch this space.

Change we can grovel in

We read an opinion today by the Jakarta Post [1] and couldn't keep wondering why on earth they would write something like this. It's on Obama not coming to Indonesia in his Asia tour.

Read the whole thing there but here is some taste of it:

------
" [...] Indonesia – the world’s third-largest democracy and country with the world’s largest Muslim population – is of vital strategic importance to the US [...] A new era of US-Indonesia relations was touted [...]

But when it came time for recognition, we did not get our expected due.

"Two days in Japan, two cities in four days in China, two days in Korea, three days in Singapore, and not a minute in Indonesia? We all wonder. [...]

But the news of the cancellation [...], is a letdown that speaks volumes as to the significance, or lack thereof, Indonesia is granted in American foreign policy circles.

Some insiders claim Obama actually wants to visit next year [...]
Be that as it may, the hurt has been done. Even a five-hour pause at the airport and palace would have sufficed. "
-----

Now hang on a minute, because we got some questions:

Question number one, who's hurt by Mr Obama not visiting Indonesia?
Our answer: Not us the little people. Not us mere mortal earning less than a dollar a day and have to live with horrible traffic day in day out to earn it.
(We still remember the time when W Bush visited Indonesia and how annoying the security measures were.)
So let's see. Obama's not coming. Hmm.. Do we feel hurt? Any pain at all? A little depressed maybe? Some kind of feeling? Disappointment? Anything? Deep down inside? Hmm...

Nope. Nothing. Sorry.

As a matter of fact, we didn't even know he's planning to be in the neighbourhood.
Sure, we like Obama and his hope thing. But it does not mean we would grovel for his attention. Haven't we grovelled enough throughout history? Let's have some dignity for a change. (Change! hey, another Obama thing).

And number two, why do we need recognition from Mr. O on how well we did democracy-wise?
What does a thumbs-up from him mean anyway?
Let's see: we got our democracy after the fall of Suharto. And what country supported Suharto to stay in power for decades? Oh, that's right. The good old US of A [2].
So we set ourselves free from a dictator that they once supported, and now we want THEIR recognition?

Really, Jakarta Post? Really?

Sorry, but when it comes to recognition, the only two-thumbs-up we need is from our own people, and that is yet to be seen.

So speak for yourself, Jakarta Post.

---------
Source:
[1] The Jakarta Post - Barry’s snub
[2] AFP - US propped up Suharto despite rights abuses: documents

God's will?

It's God's will, some say. And we hear this time and time again when disaster strikes (such as the recent earthquake that took way too many lives.)

It's God's will, some say.
Sure, some of us Indonesians (if not most of us) are religious in one way or another. So respecting God's will is an instinctive response.

It's God's will.

Is it?
OK, earthquake is a natural phenomenon, but if we really look at it, it's not the earthquake that killed most of our folks there. It's the landslides that followed the earthquake.
And the crumbling building: The crumbling schools, hospitals, houses...

We may not be able to predict earthquake, but we can calculate the risk of landslide ahead of time.

We cannot prevent earthquake, but we can prevent our schools from crashing down on our children by building them stronger.

So no. Sorry. It's not God's will. Not yet.
If we ride a motorcycle without a helmet and then crash and crack our head, who's fault is it?
Are we going to blame it on God too?

Please do not get us wrong. We are not questioning the greater power, and we are not saying that it is wrong to be religious. No.

We are just trying to point out that some deaths that occurred after the earthquake are actually preventable. And it is our fault that we failed to do so. Not God's.

After the earthquake in Jogja, when people were starting to rebuild, there were some talks on how to build an earthquake-proof house. A stronger structure that if not withstand the average earthquake, at least stay together long enough to give time for the people inside to get out.

Some also say that it actually does not cost more, especially if we build the house from scratch, as many people in Jogja had to do anyway at the time, since their houses were destroyed.

Days and months passed by since then. And what happen in the end?
People rebuild the houses the same way they did before. It's the same old.
So if another earthquake strikes the area again (God forbid), the same thing will happen again.

And again.
And again.

Read this news:
The number of schools damaged and destroyed because of the earthquake in West Sumatra is 1.929 [1]. The news is dated October 6, 2009.

And now read this:
An earthquake of 5.8 Richter scale in West Sumatra has destroyed 295 schools, killing three teachers and four students [2].
When is this? March 9, 2007. More than two years ago.

See?
Again.
And again.
And again.

And that's God's will?

If we failed to prevent the preventable, it's our own fault.

We do preventive measures all the time: We took vaccination. Wear helmet. Seatbelt. We use antibacterial soap. We work out and eat our vegetables.

We do them to prevent bad things from happening to us.

But somehow when it comes to building our houses, our hospitals, our schools we just don't think that far.

It's not ok to ride a motorcycle without a helmet, but we can get away with building schools with shoddy structures.

And when the earth started moving, our schools crumbled, killing our children, we say it's God's will.

Please.

Sure, having stronger buildings will not prevent casualties 100%.
Sure, when it is time to go it is time to go.

But when's the last time we hear an earthquake killing thousands in Japan? This is a country with daily earthquakes. is that God's will, or is it because the Japanese decided to have enough with the deaths and started building better structures to withstand the tremor?

Clearly, there is a way to prevent the worst.

So enough with it already.
When it is our fault, it is our fault.
It's nothing we cannot fix.

If we fix it right, when another earthquake occurs in the future (and it will), the news hopefully will be a short one: Earthquake, 8 richter scale. No casualty. No major damage.

Now that's God's will.

----
Source:
[1] Republika - Gedung Sekolah Rusak Akibat Gempa 1.929 Unit
[2] Detik - Gempa Sumbar, 295 Sekolah Rusak, 3 Guru dan 4 Siswa Tewas

It's no crime

In the past (and in our book) we wrote our opinion that drug users should not be thrown to jail.
That drug users are not criminals. They committed no crime.

(We think for an act to be considered a crime, there should be at least a victim. Either a loss or damage of property, injury, death etc.
When people use drugs, there is no other victim other than themselves.
This should set a clear differentiation between drug users and drug dealers. Drug users are not criminals, drug dealers are).

So let's say we change the law and drug users don't need to worry about jail anymore. What will happen?

We so far collected this concerns among us:

1. If people can do drugs freely, won't our street be full of drug addicts, hovering around, knocked out unconscious on the sidewalks and city parks?

2. Will the number of drug addiction rise because of it? After all, if we can do it freely, we would at least try, right? And then got hooked?

3. With harsh drug law in neighboring countries like Malaysia and Singapore, wouldn't drug tourists from those countries will just come to Indonesia in great numbers to get high?
Wouldn't that ruin Indonesia's reputation? Visit Indonesia and get high!

So let's get this straight: We, the IA folks are old people, we are not that funky and we are not suggesting legalization of drugs.
We are suggesting that it is not a crime and the punishment should not be jail.

This means, you will still have to answer to the authority when you use drugs. You just won't be thrown to jail. Instead, we will make sure you undergo therapy. (more on this later).
So no, our streets won't be suddenly flooded with people getting high. It's not that kind of freedom.

Decriminalization. Not legalization.
We want drug users to feel safe when they admit that they have problems.
After all, how do we expect them to admit their addiction if we'll throw them in jail as soon as they open their mouth?
We want them to openly seek help. And get help. Just like people with alcohol or gambling addiction need.
Help.

But if drug-use is so lightly punished, will the number of addiction increase? What about drug tourists from neighboring countries?

It may be good to learn from other country's experience on this, so it was heaven-sent that we found the report on Drug Decriminalization in Portugal [1].

Apparently, in 2001 a nationwide law in Portugal took effect that decriminalized all drugs and that means:

"...drug possession for personal use and drug usage itself are still legally prohibited, but violations of those prohibitions are deemed to be exclusively administrative violations and are removed completely from the criminal realm. [1]"

Starting in 2001! So what's the result? Bear in mind that Portugal is part of the European Union, and that people within the EU have freedom of movement. With Portugal the only country in the region decriminalizing drug use*, do European drug addicts flock to Portugal to get high?
No. Did not happen.

"Roughly 95 percent of those cited for drug offenses every year since decriminalization have been Portuguese.
Close to zero have been citizens of other EU states" [3].

Do number of drug addictions rise? No. It went down. It is "in numerous categories are now among the lowest in the European Union [2]".
Drug related problems, including sexually transmitted diseases and death from overdoses has decreased. The number of newly reported cases of HIV and AIDS among drug addicts has declined substantially every year since 2001 [3].

So there you go.

All right. We mentioned therapy earlier, and of course we do caught some concerns from some of us here:

"Therapy is not cheap. If therapy is mandatory for all drug addicts, who's going to pay for it? There are plenty of poor addicts out there who cannot afford therapy.
So who's going to pay? The government? Using our tax money?
I won't be too happy if my tax money is used to finance addictions when it is badly needed to improve our education, our infrastructure etc.
There is no way I am paying for that."

But then one responded:

"Oh really? Then who's paying for all drug addicts' food and care when they are in jail right now? Jail is not cheap either, and guess what: you've been paying for it.
That includes paying for the judges, prosecutors and the courts for processing each and every one of this offenders. That's money too, you know."

"and what about the offenders who are actually productive citizens and got caught for recreational drug use? This folks are in jail doing nothing when otherwise they will be working and paying taxes. What about the loss of tax revenue there? If they go to therapy instead, they can still work and in turn pay their taxes."

In a way, providing therapy would be money better spent, because a drug free generation will be a more productive generation. And if it can help reducing the number of addicts, as it does in Portugal, then we will spend less and less in the long run. And our jails won't be overcrowded.

And of course there is another concern starting from this point, as one friend put it:

"I can already see it now: dodgy therapy clinics sprouting all around us, taking the government money, selling 'I completed my therapy and I am clean' certificate to drug addicts, without even providing proper service.
For sale: get-out-of-jail card. Get one now. 20% off for repeat offenders..."

Ah. We never say it's a perfect world....

-----------------------------
* Some dear readers may wonder when we wrote Portugal as the only country in the EU that decriminalize drug use. What about the Netherlands?
There is decriminalization and there is depenalization. Depenalization means drug use itself is still a crime. In a “depenalized” framework, drug usage remains a criminal offense, but imprisonment is no longer imposed for possession or usage even as other criminal sanctions (e.g., fines, police record, probation) remain available.
No EU state other than Portugal has explicitly declared drugs to be “decriminalized.” [3]


[1] Cato.org - Drug Decriminalization in Portugal: Lessons for Creating Fair and Successful Drug Policies


[2] Portugal's drug policy: Treating, not punishing
The Economist, August 29 - September 4 2009, page 23

[3] Drug Decriminalization in Portugal: Lessons for Creating Fair and Successful Drug Policies, Glenn Greenwald, CATO Institute.
(PDF File.)

Still Up?

It's quite touching to from time to time receive an email or two from dear readers asking why we don't write very often.
That's very sweet. Thank you.

And if we could, we would blog more. It's fun. More fun than working, really.

Unfortunately it is difficult to write something when most of our time we are exhausted doing this mundane things we call our job.
(Just like everybody else we have to earn our living, and earn it hard).

That's not an excuse, of course. Many other bloggers who are busy can still manage to write and write really really well.

So we'll try to do better. We manage to hang on this long, certainly we can push ourselves a bit more.

To make life easier, you, our dear readers, can use newsfeed reader and subscribe to our RSS, together with all other blogs you would like to read. This way you don't have to keep coming here and get disappointed when there is no new post. When we have new post, you'll see it on your reader. (That if you don't know about this already). There is no ad in our RSS or anywhere in this blog, so you can subscribe to our feed and still have your peace.

Thank you for being with us. And please hang in there. We may not write often, but we do write.

This blog was up since 2005, and nobody among us thought it would last this long, and yet we are still around. And we will be around for say another half a decade (that's when our oldest colleagues would, well, too cranky to quote for a post).

If our young colleagues are willing to pick up this silly blog where we left it, it may last even longer than that.

So we will be around.

As our middle-aged male colleagues would say:
"the point is not about getting it up. It's about keeping it up for as long as you can".

And yes, we are still talking about blogging.
Four good years of it.

At 64, a work in progress

More than a decade ago there was this thought in our mind, whenever we looked at our children:

What if, one day, in the future, our children looked at us and ask:

"Mom, Dad, What have you done? Why did you leave behind this poor, corrupt and undemocratic country? Why didn't you do something to change it? Now we have to fix everything..."

So now, looking back, we are relieved to know that we can say:

Guess what, kids. We did do something.
We have democracy now.

It's not perfect, of course.
But then again kids, try name one country that has a perfect democratic system. Can you think of one? Because we couldn't.

We're still poor, yes.
And yes. corruption is still a big problem [1].

We're still working on it. And that's what we will leave behind.

A work in progress.

So get ready to take over the work.
And please, take care of this young democracy.

Because getting this far wasn't easy.


---------------
[1] In 2008 Transparency International Corruption perception index, Indonesia is ranked 126 of 180. Below Honduras, Guyana, and Ethiopia. As a comparison, Thailand is 80, Malaysia is 47.
But to make us feel better, in 2007 Indonesia was ranked 143 of 179, so not all is bad.
Source: Transparency International - Corruption Perceptions Index 2007 , 2008.